i have decided that i am going to be writing here for everyone to see. i am doing this because i think it will be cool to reflect on! today i woke up and hung out with MK and John. we watched Reggie Watts and i ate some egg with ground beef, spinach, and bacon with some toast. eating has been hard lately because although i have been off of alcohol and tobacco for going on 6 months now, my body still relies on marijuana to feel hunger sometimes and that's wrong. i have been wanting to get off of all substances for a bit now but haven't found it within myself to fully let go. i've been changing physically and i feel much better about my health, but i know that i am still holding myself back from becoming as great as i can be. it's hard sometimes with everything going on every day to stand above it. my nose isn't under the surface but i can feel the swamp pulling at my ankles, begging me to give into the hatred and pain that i feel every day and become consumed in it. i won't allow it. i have come too far and done too much good to stop. i will enjoy today and i hope you will too no matter who you are. i am the little darkie. we are the same