it's been a few weeks since i last wrote. today has been super stupid so far. i've been having arguments with people i love and i feel like the life is draining out of me. i really just want everything to be okay and sometimes it's hard to tell if i am the problem, if the other people around me are the problem, or both. my body dysmorphia is better but definitely still there and i just want to get over it. there's still a lot of work to do though. i can't stop now. i am thankful for the opportunities before me and i will not give up.